9 Things about a Stay at Home Dad

Whether you’re choosing to be a stay at home dad, or forced into it by a downsizing or similar experience here are some thoughts to consider.

Get Real!

There are a lot of illusions about the being a stay at home dad. People picture waking up late, and just hanging out at home with the kids and having a ton of free time. Realize especially with younger kids that it is full time work, and you have to pay attention to those kids and make sure their needs are being met. Not to mention house work, meals, diapers, and errands.

And you thought that stay at home moms had it so good.

Housekeeper, to be or not to be?

Early on even before you start becoming the full time parent in the house, you need to think about the extra work that needs to be done around the house.

Chores that need to be done regularly include:

• Taking out the garbage

• Cleaning dishes and kitchen

• Sweeping/Mopping the floor

• Dusting

• And vacuuming.

With your wife sit down and discuss your feeling about how much you really think you can accomplish given that children are a full time job without the extra house work. Decide on what chores are your responsibilities and which ones can be shared with her. Establish roles and clear guidelines for when you’ll be expected to have these tasks completed. The key here is communication.

Stay on Schedule

The stay at home dad lifestyle can allow you freedom to do things and go places during the time when many people are working, but it’s not complete freedom. Your kid(s) as well as you need a schedule.

The structure provided by keeping a loose schedule makes getting things done much easier. It also ensures that you don’t forget important things like meals, diaper changes and nap times. (Believe me, it happens) It doesn’t have to be a rigid timetable of events but a loose and easygoing plan of action is advisable.

Break up Cabin Fever.

After getting settled into the stay at home dad lifestyle, you may find that it’s very isolating. After a while you may realize that you’ve not left that house in a few days. This happened to me during points when my wife would take our only car to work. It’s important however, to at least get outside. Take a walk, go to a park, or enjoy time in the backyard. If you have a vehicle, get out of the house for a while every few days, it breaks up the monotony and tension that being at home for a few days cause.

Stay Plugged In.

More than just getting out of the house, the isolation can be caused by a lack of communication with anyone but your child and your wife. This is why it’s a big deal to stay connected to the outside world. Get some adult talk time in, whether you talk to friends, other parents (often time mothers), other stay at home dads or members of your family.

Staying connected to the world and not living like a hermit makes the lifestyle a lot easier to handle on the bad days.

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